He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
