Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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