wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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