my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
