I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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