I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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