"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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