No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
