it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
i dont even know how to be here
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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