Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
