We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
