exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
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He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
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That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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