I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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