You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
