I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She bit a glass in half.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize