Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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