Plan B is the new Plan A
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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