i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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