the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
