My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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