i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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