belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
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