he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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