I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
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You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
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My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
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