Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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