Pappa wants mamma naked
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck