bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Dick very happy bro
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
