Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
