shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
its not stalking. its research.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
