Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
