It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize