I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
