I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize