We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
