He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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