when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
