apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize