so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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