Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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