He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize