I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
It's blow job season.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
