Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I believe in your delicious