I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
