Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Houston, we have a blender
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
