well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
