wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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