i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
