I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
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