this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize