i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
